what is it we do?

Everyone encounters a DIRTBAG in their life. We are here to help you settle the score. Check out our Bags...Make a Statement! We will send it anonymously or with your personalized message.

Let us do your dirty work

our best seller

Certified Dirt Bag
Certified Dirt Bag
Certified Dirt Bag
Certified Dirt Bag
Certified Dirt Bag
Certified Dirt Bag
Certified Dirt Bag
Certified Dirt Bag
Certified Dirt Bag


Certified Dirt Bag


Dirt Bag is a great way to tell someone they are, well...a dirtbag! Our bags of dirt are sent with a card that reads "You're a dirtbag!". This complete package can be sent anonymously or with a personalized message to the dirtbag of your choice.

Can't think of any dirtbags in your life? Just break up with your ex? DIRTBAG!. Did your boss promote a coworker over you? DIRTBAG!. The neighbor from down the street lets their dog crap in your yard and then leaves it? DIRTBAG!. Any person, any occasion.


IMPORTANT: Make sure you put the recipient's name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise, it is you that ends up with the Certified Dirt Bag package, which can be OK too if you want to gift it yourself or give it to them in person.

*If personalizing the back of the card, write down your message in the note area during checkout!*

**Purchaser and recipient must be at least 18 years of age.**

who deserves a dirt bag?

broken relationship

It's not just for cheaters any more. Yeah, that is the biggest "go-to" reason, but split ups happen for many reasons. Most result in someone being a dirtbag. Seize the moment and send an Original Dirt Bag. 

crappy neighbor

For those neighbors that walk their dogs past your property and figure, it's not my yard. To them we say, "Pick up your crap, DIRTBAG!" Or...you can surprise them with a COLOSSAL Dirt Bag.

old fart

Birthdays are awesome, when you are young. But as the years roll by and the candles on you friend's cake becomes a fire hazzard, play it safe and order an Older Than Dirt Bag instead.

dimwit friend

Not everyone is as poised and perfect as you are. For some, a lack of judgment or mis-guided event is an ideal excuse to celebrate their weakness with a Dumber Than Dirt Bag.


We keep tabs of your purchases and after the 4th Dirt Bag...you get 1 FREE!


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